Boxing Day, like Christmas Day, and every other day for that matter, comes but once a year. For some people it’s a day of rest and recovery after the excesses of the day before, for others it’s a case of eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we’re back at work, but for a select few, forty-nine to be exact, it was an opportunity to run/struggle (take your pick) around the ups and downs of Carnfunnock Country Park with the only reward for most of them being a cup of tea or coffee, a biscuit and a bun or two and the chance to win a bar of chocolate, a bottle of shower gel or, if they were really lucky, a bottle of plonk, fizzy or otherwise.. The run around Carnfunnock being, of course, Larne AC’s Hasting’s Financial Services sponsored Boxing Day Handicap.
Being a handicap, the runners’ starting times were pre-determined by the handicapper, with guest runner Katy McKeegan being the first to get under way, some twenty-eight minutes ahead of Jordan Heron who, as is now customary in Larne AC handicaps, was the last to start. Once all the runners were on their way the hard graft really began, but the timekeepers and supporters were up for it. They retired to the Dixon Hall, got the flasks and goodies out and proceeded to discuss among other things how Baron Billy Hardup tried to twist the arms of his children into helping out with the refreshments and also somehow managed to sweet-talk the sainted Arlene into baking buns on Christmas Day. Note – Arlene hasn’t set a precedent for future refreshment providers.
While all this hot-air generating was going on in the hall, the runners were huffing and puffing their way around the figure-of-eight laps of Carnfunnock with varying degrees of success. It’s debateable whether any of them were actually looking forward to the climbs of the steps but it’s highly likely that some coped better with the climbs that other. Irrespective of how each runner navigated the steps (ran, walked or, god forbid, crawled), forty seven of them still completed the two laps of the Park without serious mishap before heading back along the 500m run alongside the road to the finish line where they proceeded to cause mayhem for the timers (Memo to self: inform Jackie that one of the fundamental tasks of a timekeeper is to shout out the times or, alternatively, add two minutes to every runner’s handicap so that no runner finishes within one minute of any other runner.).
In spite of the chaos at the finish line, the timers still somehow managed to sort out Jackie’s mess (Luckily for me he’s got a broad back.) and come up with what is hopefully a fairly accurate list of results. Full details are set out in the table below, but it’s worth noting that, while guest runners occupied the first five places, with Kian McRandal being first to cross the line in a time of 33:26, the actual winner of the club’s handicap was Michelle Woods, with her winning time of 45:44 being six minutes faster bar one second than her time for last year’s race. Cinderella got to go to the ball after all. Second home for the club was Ashlynn Rodgers in a time of 35:52, the fastest time of the day by a female runner and probably Ashlynn best ever performance in a club handicap. The club’s third finisher was defending champion Eddie Finn, who crossed the line in a time of 43:06 while the overall fastest time of the day was, unsurprisingly, the 25:51 set by Jordan Heron
No race could go ahead without the help and support of club members and their friends and families and today’s race, which was open to guest runners and run over a course with more than its fair share of twists and turns most definitely could not have taken places without the help of the elves who marshalled, timed, helped pull together the results, organised the prizes, provided the refreshments and generally encouraged the runners. I would name names but for fear of leaving someone out so a well-deserved thank you to all concerned, even Jackie and Billy (or Shrek and donkey as we like to think of them) who, despite the brickbats fired at them in various handicap reports continue to take them all in good heart – or at least pretend to.
CARNFUNNOCK HANDICAP – 26 DECEMBER 2023
| Place | Name | H’cap | Race Time | Corrected Time | 2022* Time |
| 1 | Kian McRandal | 13:15 | 46:41 | 33:26 | |
| 2 | Jose Leal | 13:30 | 46:58 | 33:28 | |
| 3 | Dylan McRandal | 17:10 | 48:51 | 31:41 | |
| 4 | Lauran Bell | 06:00 | 50:19 | 44:19 | |
| 5 | Evelyn Cooke | 00:40 | 50:35 | 49:55 | |
| 6 | Michelle Woods | 05:00 | 50:44 | 45:44 | 51:43 |
| 7 | Andrew Erwin | 13:50 | 50:54 | 37:04 | |
| 8 | Daryl Asquith | 09:30 | 50:58 | 41:28 | |
| 9 | Ashlynn Rodgers | 15:40 | 51:32 | 35:52 | |
| 10 | Eddie Finn | 08:30 | 51:36 | 43:06 | 45:51 |
| 11 | Paul Hutchinson | 21:40 | 51:50 | 30:10 | 33:46 |
| 12 | Jess Garstin | 06:45 | 51:55 | 45:10 | |
| 13 | Beth McFerran | 10:00 | 52:02 | 42:02 | |
| 14 | Katy McKeegan | 00:00 | 52:13 | 52:13 | |
| 15 | Dale Smith | 19:35 | 52:22 | 32:47 | 35:59 |
| 16 | Paul McRandal | 09:45 | 52:54 | 43:09 | 48:21 |
| 17 | Ethan Simpson | 11:15 | 53:01 | 41:46 | |
| 18 | Karl Simpon | 11:00 | 53:43 | 42:43 | |
| 19 | Daniel Garstin | 13:10 | 53:48 | 40:38 | |
| 20 | Jordan Heron | 28:00 | 53:53 | 25:53 | 30:18 |
| 21 | Adrian Aiken | 18:00 | 54:15 | 36:15 | |
| =22 | Marie Hagan | 05:25 | 54:17 | 48:52 | 54:52 |
| =22 | Rhonda Wallace | 05:25 | 54:17 | 48:52 | 51:45 |
| 24 | Laura Brennan | 12:50 | 54:28 | 41:38 | 49:24 |
| 25 | Ross Beattie | 20:45 | 54:44 | 33:59 | 39:00 |
| 26 | Nat Glenn | 25:30 | 54:47 | 29:17 | |
| 27 | Andy Gregg | 20:20 | 54:50 | 34:30 | |
| 28 | Diane Hawthorne | 09:30 | 54:54 | 45:24 | 49:09 |
| 29 | Emma McKeen | 14:50 | 54:59 | 40:09 | 42:22 |
| =30 | Beverley Gaston | 15:20 | 55:00 | 39:40 | 43:05 |
| =30 | Chris Davis | 23:45 | 55:00 | 31:15 | |
| =32 | Matt Johnston | 18:25 | 55:06 | 36:41 | |
| =32 | David Johnston | 20:30 | 55:06 | 34:36 | 46:27 |
| 34 | Lee Clements | 17:30 | 55:08 | 37:38 | |
| 35 | Thomas Craig | 24:00 | 55:11 | 31:11 | |
| 36 | Iain Bailie | 11:30 | 55:16 | 43:46 | 45:49 |
| 37 | Juliane Keane | 16:25 | 55:18 | 38:53 | |
| 38 | Emmett Woods | 18:55 | 55:27 | 36:32 | 39:41 |
| 39 | Gemma Davies | 19:10 | 55:52 | 36:42 | 39:13 |
| 40 | Phil McNeill | 19:55 | 56:14 | 36:19 | |
| 41 | Thompson Crawford | 20:05 | 56:49 | 36:44 | |
| 42 | Karl Dines | 23:00 | 56:51 | 33:51 | 39:22 |
| 43 | Sean McAllister | 23:35 | 56:57 | 33:22 | 34:17 |
| 44 | John Steele | 22:30 | 57:04 | 34:34 | 37:59 |
| 45 | Andrew Davison | 09:15 | 57:37 | 48:22 | |
| =46 | Ian Brennan | 12:00 | 58:45 | 46:45 | 50:37 |
| =46 | Paul Tilson | 21:00 | 58:45 | 37:45 | |
| DNF | Allan McCullough | Saving his powder for another day. | |||
| DNF | Nigel Kane | Retired injured. | |||
*Achieved under different underfoot conditions and a slightly different course, which may account for part of some of the improvements made but certainly not all of it.